One Snarky Chica with Issues

There was a point in my life not all that long ago where I was having some major anger issues. That tends to happen when you carry around anger for a few years without letting it out in a healthy manner. The funny thing is that at the time I didn’t even realize just how angry I was and how bad my anger issues were for me and those closest to me. It took someone stepping and telling me that I needed to work on my anger issues for me to have an “a-ha” moment and realize they were right.

I am no longer an angry person because I have learned how to deal with anger as it comes instead of letting anger control me.  There are a few different strategies that you can employ to help get a handle on your anger and control it before it controls you.

1. Find out what is causing your anger. The old me used to arrive at work angry and blame it on idiot drivers and traffic. I would spend my entire day angry, get in the car and come home angry and blame it on the same thing. I was always blaming my anger on something and it was never the root of the problem. It took me a long time to find out what was causing my anger. Once you can find out what is causing your anger then you know how to control it or even stop it.

2. Employ some simple relaxation techniques to calm yourself. Deep breaths and happy imagery can go a long way when you are angry. Try sitting down and closing your eyes and taking deep breaths, focusing on each inhale and exhale. Imagine a relaxing place or something that makes you happy to get your mind away from the anger. You can also utilize essential oils, like lavender, and calming music and candles to relax.

3. Change your angry habits. If you are an angry driver that throws their hands up in the air when you think someone else on the road is being an idiot, try not to do that next time. You would be amazed how something as simple as this effects your anger levels. (I speak from experience on this one )

4.  Be a better communicator. If you anger is with another person or tends to come out when you are with another person it is probably due to a break down in communication. More than likely one, or both, of you is jumping to a conclusion here or there and the end result is a big ole angry mess. When working on your communication techniques remember that listening is an important part of being an effective communicator.

5. Laugh it off. It may sound like something easier said than done, but instead of getting angry about something you should laugh about it. For instance, in my example above about throwing your hands up in the car, you could have a comedy CD playing in your car to keep you from being mad. It’s hard to scowl and laugh at the same time. Go ahead - try it.